Autism Hasn’t Beaten Us…
As you all know my Little Poptart ~ Kalya was diagnosed with Autism. It was on Nov 17, 2007. It still amazes me that I remember that date so exact yet I can’t remember what the hell I did last week. Anyway… we, like so many others in New Jersey, were referred by her amazing pediatrician Dr. Mabagos to Early Intervention. At that time Kayla was only saying DaDa and Dr. J (as Kayla calls him) was concerned. We gave it one extra month to see if she would come around, because naturally I blamed her “not speaking thing” on myself.
Finally, we called Early Intervention and they came out to do an initial evaluation. I still remember trying so hard not to defend her abilities, or cry as they sat there with her on the floor getting her to do different tasks. ”They are so mean, they aren’t giving her long enough to try, they give her the toy and then they rip it away.,” I said to my husband. He tried to console me, as he told me they aren’t being mean, they are trying to do their job. When it was all done they did recommend us for speech and occupational therapy services through them and that we should also contact Children’s Specialized Hospital for an Autism Evaluation. She was showing some autistic tendencies, such as lining up things, lack of attention, and no eye contact.
(insert mouth drop followed by bad mouthing them after they left)
I waited a day to calm down and then I called. I did a phone screening with a woman from Children’s Specialized. I advised her everything Early Intervention had said, while also defending my daughter’s tendencies. She finally set us up with a prescreening evaluation at the hospital. Kayla sat with another woman who did the same kind of testing Early Intervention did with giving simple commands with toys to see if she would follow the directions, or show any interest in them. She almost passed us through as a “normal” 2 year old, but out of no where I spoke up regarding some of her behaviors.
Behaviors now that I can’t even really remember. Most of the early days are plagued with feelings of utter disappointment in myself that I wasn’t a good enough mother, not doing enough for her, not affectionate enough, didn’t play enough with her, etc. I had no idea what I was doing. This was my first child, and I felt very much alone, angry and exhausted. We now realize I should have been seen for post partum depression.
We live and learn.
Because of my concerns, the Children’s Specialized hospital counselor decided to send us on for the official team evaluation. There we met with several therapists that studied Kayla for hours, asked us a gazillion questions, and then came back in to meet with us. With a mild upbeat manner, the team coordinator advised us…
“We are going to go ahead and diagnois her with Autism Spectrum Disorder.”
I thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest or that I was having a heart attack. The tears were right there, along with a massive lump in my throat. I wasn’t going to be able to hold back anymore, and at the moment I opened my mouth to ask my first question the tears began falling. At that time all I knew of Autism, as with so many other parents, is of the child sitting in the corner banging their head against a wall. The therapist advised that those are the most extreme cases. I was very lucky, they said Kayla is very low spectrum and they were going to set us up with occupational therapy and speech. I took the rest of that day to process, and cry. Then I was on the phone the very next day making appointments. I, to everyones surprise, had her in the very next week. We were blessed with Ms. Elke and Ms. Patty at Children’s Specialized in Toms River, who not only helped teach Kayla, but also was there for me as well. They listened to me, they talked to me and they taught me what I needed to know so that I could carry over the therapy at home, which would make a great impact on beating this. In addition the sessions at Children’s Specialized, she still had the Early Intervention coming into the house until she turned 3 and was then transferred to a special preschool program at our public school. There we were blessed with Mrs. Kasper who was the sweetest thing ever. Her and Kayla made such a connection and she was able to teach her so much. Kayla says she wants to be a teacher like Mrs. Kasper when she grows up.
I see now why the team coordinator at Children’s Specialized was not sad by giving us the diagnosis. Because of that diagnosis we were able to get all the right kind of help and so much of it. Kayla has come so very far from where she was. She is always laughing, playing, singing, dancing, smiling, and, I am pleased to say is now more than making up for her delayed speech in the past. She is a total social butterfly who is currently transitioning into kindergarden, is reading at a 3rd grade level and loves helping me cook and keep daddy and our four cats in line.
♫[singsong-insert:http://www.oneblondesramblings.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Oh-Mr-Sun-as-Sung-By-Kayla.m4a] ♫
Thank you so very much to all of Kayla’s teachers and therapists as well as to ALL of the men and women who are out there making it their life mission to help in changing the lives of our children and ourselves so that Autism won’t beat us.
Tagged with: Autism Awareness • oneblondesramblings.com
Filed under: Autism • Personal
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So touching, thanks for sharing this
Ok so I can’t believe I am going to admit this. One of my greatest fears while I was pregnant was having a child that was Autistic. I don’t know why I just truly thought I was not cut from the cloth that all these mothers who are handling it were. But thanks to blogs like yours, shows like parenthood and activists like Jenny I somehow got to the space where I could handle anything. While my son is only 6 months old and shows no signs of Autism or anything for that matter I have found that I am now the mom and the believer that I can get through anything, any challenge. I am enjoying getting to know you and hope you will continue to visit my blog. I appreciate your honesty in this post both with yourself and me!
Oh and I so could not pull off the Victoria Beckham but if you do, Rock it with all you got
This makes me teary eyed. Love you Kayla! Everyone is so proud of you.
Your story was so wonderful that I added your link to my Light it up blue post.
Thank you so much!
Thank you so much, same here.
The strength is in all of us, its whether or not we choose to tap into it. I didn’t think I was either, as I said I always doubted whether I was doing enough, but she is my baby, “Not” was not an option. I definitely recommend start working with him now. The Baby Einstein sign videos and your baby can read programs are an AWESOME way to start.
If you ever have any questions or concerns going forward I would be more than happy to help…just email me. oneblondesramblings@gmail.com
Hi! I just want to say that while we can’t control what we are handed in life, the right approach to everything can make such a difference. No doubt due to you being her mommy she is doing soo much better than she could be doing and do to the early intervention that most certainly has helped too. While I don’t understand the emotional effects of having a child with autism, I sympathize and think you are doing an amazing job. She is a beautiful little girl!
P.S. New follower from the Weekend blog hop. Have a great weekend!
Heather From and Mommy Only Has Two Hands!
Thank you for joining us for the Finding New Friends Weekend Blog Hop. I’m now following you! Please remember to join us again next Friday to find great new blogs and make new bloggy friends!
Jeannette
http://www.myadventureinmommyhood.blogspot.com
Hi from your newest follower. Wonderful Blog you have. When you get the time please check out my blog and return the follow. I am going to be having AWSOME giveaways all throughout the year. Also PLEASE consider buying one of my cookbooks.
http://threwourtearsandlaughter.blogspot.com/
Thank You and Many Blessings to you and yours,
Connie C
Your daughter is beautiful! I love her red hair, but I’m a redhead too so I’m partial LOL!
Stopping by from comment love weekend!
Thank you for sharing and doing it so well. I look forward to reading more.
Thank you all so much for the kind words, and encouragement. I appreciate all the l♥ve and support.
I wanted to stop by and say hi with wknd comment love. I’m glad I did. Your words made me teary eyed. You are an amazing mom and I am so proud of you.
Thanks for linking up to the Crazed Fan weekend Hop. I was the guest host this week (http://tawnassecret.blogspot.com) and am just making sure I am following everyone on the list:) I wanted to also invite you to link up to my own personally hosted hop open thru today and every Friday-Sunday at http://tawnasplan.blogspot.com
Have a wonderful day! I am now your newest follower!
Tawna
Thank-you so much for sharing! I am so happy to have found you through comment love weekend. Have a wonderful week!
Thank you so much for sharing! I teach at a specialized ASD school, and I love it when families share great stories!
I’m following from the blog hop! Come visit me back!
Michelle @ Things Sent My Way
Your daughter is beautiful,I am your newest GFC follower from the hop, drop by and see me at WV Stitcher . Have a fantastic week!